Jessica L. Moody

Questioning the Norm


the quote of the day show

So I sent Sean Croxton a message and…

I went to screenshot it because I was so excited about it… I was going to post it and respond but then… I DELETED IT!! Ugh!!  Punch to the gut!!

Well, he responded, and said he’s going to read my blog.   Yey, yey, yey!!

Well, today’s Quote of the Day is by Dr. Wayne Dyer.

“Anything that You Can Place into Your Imagination Can Harden into a Reality.”

Successful people follow specific principals.  They “know in [their] heart what [they] are here for, what [they] came to do.”

I have come to the point this year of really defining what it is I’m here for and what I came to do.  You can read about it here.  This is an ongoing and changing process.  But overall, I am here to support people in achieving their dreams, I’m here to teach and streamline curriculum and teaching processes, and I am here to show other people God’s love through Christ.  

If you haven’t created a Mission statement for your life, I suggest that you do that.  Dan Miller has a process that you can go through here.  If you don’t know who you are and what you are doing here, you won’t go anywhere that you want to go.  

As a high school English teacher, I have heard many students claim that they are going to be millionaires.  When I ask them how, most of the time they have no clue.  They may rap, sing, or do some other creative venture, but they generally are lacking follow-through and purpose.  Now I don’t necessarily blame them.  There are quite a few teenagers that will have a wake-up call when they graduate and realized how expensive it is just to survive. But it is way worse when I hear grown men and women either being completely defeated by the world and complacent OR still imagining success without taking any steps to achieve it.

In Dr. Dryer’s clip, he describes Maslow’s Self-Actualization.  He says that “there are certain people who come into this world that come from a self-actualized perspective”, they don’t let others define them, and they are are seldom understood.

Since I’ve gone through this process of realizing my skills and trying to define what I am here for, it has created a disconnect between me and many of the people around me.  They look at me amazed and tell me things like, “Wow, you are so motivated!”  I even people tell me that I’m smart, which if you knew me in grade school, most people thought I was the ditsy blonde, and I have worked very hard to dispel this assumption.   I will no longer hold on to what other people think of me.  I will create who I want them to see.  I will be who I was created to be.

Are you who you want to be or what others expect from you?  

Sometimes when we go through hardships, and overcome them, it puts us in a situation where we must redefine ourselves.

In the Marine Corps we call this Mind over matter: “If you don’t mind, it don’t matter!!”  When I went through the hardest time in my life.  I had lost almost everything in my life.  I had no money. I was borderline homeless and had to start over from scratch.  This was my turning point.  I had no other choice but to pull up my bootstraps and move forward. This was the time I depended on God to lead my steps and tell me where to go.  3 years later I feel like I’m back at the beginning except for one thing: I know my worth. I know my skills. I know what I’m here for.  The question becomes: “What now?”

Well, I’m writing more.  I’m creating more.  I’m determined to succeed and I’m taking steps daily to achieve those dreams.  I WILL DO IT!! I will!!  I am placing it into my imagination and will see it become reality!!  

How about you?


How to Ask Questions That Elicit a Response From Your Audience

like Tony Robbins does

Tony Robbins is not paid for being a motivational speaker only because he was born to speak, he has natural talent, or he is saying something new.  He may have a natural talent for speaking but without practicing the techniques used to appeal his audience, he would not be successful.  He could have all the natural talent in the world but without good preparation before he speaks, his events would fall flat.  Most of the time, he tells his audience things they already know, but overall, his delivery and the way that he makes the audience feel is what makes him so popular.  He makes them feel like they are having a conversation.  This is not just a natural talent that he has, but a skill that he has learned: how to effectively interact with his audience.  This skill has helped him refine his craft of speaking through building a connection to his audience.  

Many speakers might marvel at the way he can ask a question and get a useful and audible response from his audience.  Today while listening one of his clips on The Quote of the Day Show, Tony talked about what it means to be wealthy, and I was very impressed with how much his audience verbally responded to his questions.  Eliciting audience response is not easy nor does it happen randomly.  It is a skill that Tony has learned, and we can, too.  

Has there been any time when you have asked a question to an audience that you desired a response from and the person or audience assumed that it was a rhetorical question and did not respond?  Why do you think that might have happened?

Four things to think about when planning ways to interact with an audience:


  1. What is the purpose of your desired interaction?
  • Are you trying to check whether the audience is engaged, check for understanding or are you ready to move on to a new subject?




Tony makes statements like, “All those who want wealth, say ‘I’.” Then they respond.  This is a strategy that he uses to ensure that the audience is still with him and they feel like have moved from being spoken to to being a part of the conversation.  It could also be a way to keep the speaker on track, motivated, and moving forward.

Or You could be looking around, seeing glassy eyes and feeling like you are losing their attention.  This is the perfect opportunity to say something like, “Who’s with me?”  Note: You can use this to pump them up if you repeat it until you have a loud response. 


  • Are you trying to get them to make a personal connection so that it gives them the feeling of a deeper connection to you or the topic?


When an audience is given time to think about how the topic applies to their own lives, it makes them feel like they have had an interaction with you.  It makes them feel like you have listened to their part of the story.  Do not be afraid of the pregnant pause that Lisa Nichols talks about.  It is an effective tool to use to connect to your audience.

You could do this by asking a rhetorical question.  It could sound like, “Who has ever felt like this before?” Or “Think about a time when you have felt this way.”  If at all possible, let them have 5 minutes to tell their story out loud to their neighbor in a group context.  If audience members are allowed to tell their story, they will buy into yours much more effectively.   


  • Only ask a question that you already know the answer to.


As a speaker, you never want to be too surprised at what the audience says or thinks.  The speaker should be at least one step ahead of the audience.  Make sure you ask a question that you already have an idea of what the audience might say or think.  If you are not sure what the answer might be, then take some time to ask a few trusted people to tell you what they would say or think.  If you ask at least 5 people, the audience member’s answers will most likely not be far from it.    

Even if you have asked them to think of a story where they have experienced a similar event, already have a hypothetical story in mind of what they could say.  You want to know what is possible for them to think to make sure that the question is relevant to your topic.  

I have been in classes where the professor has asked the students to discuss a question, but our responses were lead us in a different direction from what he expected us to say.  We did not answer the question the way he wanted.  This is not the fault of the students.  The teacher must word or clarify the question to get students to answer the way they want in order to achieve the desired thinking they expect.

The teacher/speaker is the one responsible for creating a question that leads into the point being made.  If the question is not clear or misinterpreted, the audience will be confused and lose confidence in the speaker.  


  • Train your audience to respond


Just because you ask a good question, doesn’t mean that the audience will know that you are expecting them to audibly respond.  We must train our audience to respond the way that we want them to.  

Use non-verbal cues: pausing, gestures, and repetition.

Tony pauses after he asks questions that he wants a response to.  As speakers, we sometimes fear silence.  We think, “If there is silence, then I will bore them, or they will have time to think about what I’m doing wrong.” This negative thinking is not true.  Pausing within a speech actually does the opposite effect.  When there is surprising silence within a speech it gives the audience time to think about what you have said, which should be exactly what you want them to do.  It also can surprise them and make them refocus their attention on you, as stated above.

If you are uncomfortable with silence, then you could just say what you want and know that they will say and gesture them to say it with your hands.  Imagine with me, you asked, like Tony Robbins did, Do people normally spend more money than they make?  An untrained audience might be silent for a second, but a trained speaker might gesture that you want them to repeat you, “Yes!”  After doing this with them once or twice, they should get the idea and respond more quickly. Finally, repeating the same activity throughout your speech will help them to get the flow of what you are expecting.

  1. Be Self-Reflective

Each time we speak or teach, we must take time to reflect on the interaction we had and how we can do it more effectively next time.  The following are a list of questions that we can ask ourselves.

  1. Did I use audience interaction for the benefit of the audience’s understanding and keeping them engaged?  Did it work? What are some things I can change next time.
  2. Were the questions worded in a way that they knew what to answer? Was there any confusion on their part or on mine?  Was anyone surprised about anything? What can I do to fix it?
  3. Did the audience pick up our cues?  How can we streamline audience interaction to get a more desired effect next time?
  4. Was this question necessary?  How can I make a question that is more impactful or interesting?  Can I expand on the interaction to provide a more meaningful interaction?



Making a Change

If you do this 10 minutes every day, you will change!!

I have changed my life this year.  It is simple and only takes about 10 minutes per day (or more if I have a longer drive or workout).  It has become my extrinsic motivator.  It has filled me with confidence and has inspired me to write more.  It has made me move out of my comfort zone into a world that is scary and unknown.  This change looks like the 10 minutes per day it takes to listen to The Quote of the Day podcast from Sean Croxton.  Everyday I listen to this podcast, and I have become hungry for more so have added audio books on Audible like The Five Second Rule, 48 Days to the Work You Love, 15 Secrets Successful People Know About Time Management or How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.

This one change of listening to The Quote of the Day Show has spurred a change in my thinking and actions.  I have stopped thinking that success was just for those people.  I have stopped thinking that I can’t change.  I have stopped thinking that since I am a type B, laid back personality that I can’t be an entrepreneur.

I have however, realized that an entrepreneur does not have to be the go-getter, boss, who is in charge of or inspires hundreds of people immediately.  I have realized that it is a conscious effort to change one thing at a time and utilize my time wisely to complete tasks efficiently.  I have gained a new desire to not waste any more time.  I don’t want to waste my life.  I don’t want to waste one more second passing time waiting for the weekend, desiring the next season, or doing anything but living in the moment.

I have been that person that has said, “I’m just never going to be skinny. I’m just not made that way.” Or “I am too laid back to run my own business.”  When people who are on that side of the success wagon in any of these areas are trying to YELL saying, “You think this was easy?!?  You think I was just made this way? You didn’t see all the struggles I have gone through to get here.  You are discounting the struggles and years of failures by acting like it was easy. It wasn’t!!”

So have a big New Years goal if you want.  Maybe this will be your year.  OR you can decide to make one change TODAY!!  Don’t wait for Monday.  If you want to get into shape, then go outside and take a walk today.

Don’t go buy a membership; reward yourself with a membership AFTER you have walked or ran every day for a month.  If you want to begin your own at-home business, don’t put ANY money into it.  Begin to build a portfolio, make the plan, ask for advice, get a free website going.  Don’t spend money on it until you have done everything you can do before you spend the money.  Make the money you put out your reward for being consistent.

As you begin to listening to people who have done it before through The Quote of the Day Show, take it and run.  Be a good steward of what you have been given now and expect it to grow in fruit.  If your goal is big, break it down to achievable steps.  Make your goals not amount made or lost but your consistency and effort.  If you want to work out, no matter what, just do 1 thing a day towards that goal, 5 minutes, 10 minutes, anything.  If you want to build your education, then listen to an audio book on the topic only on your commute to work.  If you want to build a website, do one thing per day towards it.

This is habit making that creates a lasting change.  If you have big dreams, start small but remember that it is the consistency is what will lead you closer to success!!  Let’s do this together!!


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